Well, that’s alright, then.
Originally published 28.06.12:
Oh good, it’s that time of year again, when Back to the Future date hoaxes do the rounds on Twitter and Facebook. And the rest of us bang our heads on the table in despair.
Look, I don’t blame the people who start these things, who photoshop a date in 2010 or 2011 or 2012 onto a screengrab of the DeLorean’s date readout. They’re trying to wind up the internet, and they’re succeeding. It’s an old joke, now, but if people keep falling for it they’re going to keep doing it. But the people who keep spreading it around, and making it so easy to wind everyone up… ARGH.
Why do I let it bother me? I wonder to myself. I mean, I’m a massive pedant, everyone knows that. But this one gets my back up more than most – and I think it’s because I love BTTF so much – it’s one of the most truly delightful, joyous, wonderful things that modern pop culture has ever created – that it irritates me that other people don’t care enough to get it right.
I mean, look: if you like BTTF enough that you think it will be pretty cool when we finally land on the future date featured in the film (and it will), then surely you should at least know these two basic facts:
1. Every year featured in the Back to the Future trilogy ends in a 5.
2. The first Back to the Future film is about travelling BACKWARDS in time, not FORWARDS. It’s Part II that features the trip to 2015.
Beyond those two fundamentals, however, as a Public Service Announcement I thought it would be a good idea to compile a list of all the dates referenced in the BTTF films – so that next time one of these spreads around, there’s a handy and quick reference by which to confirm that it’s utter bollocks. So here it is.
The dates the Doc punches in when showing Marty how the controls work are:
This last date is the date that Marty gets transported back in time to, as it’s the one left on screen when the Libyans arrive. Despite what some Twitterers say, the Doc never puts in “a random date”.
The date on which lightning strikes the clock tower and Marty returns to 1985 is:
The date in 1985 that Marty returns to is:
The date the Doc travels to at the end is:
The date the Doc brings Jennifer and Marty to (and thus, the ACTUAL “Future Day”) is:
The date Old Biff travels to and gives the Almanac to his past self is:
The date in “alternate” 1985 that Marty and the Doc return to is:
The date Marty and the Doc go back to retrieve the Almanac is also:
The date the Doc accidentally travels back to, because of the lightning strike jolting the time circuits (the ONLY time a “random” date is travelled to) is:
The date Marty leaves 1955 to go back to the Old West:
The date Marty arrives in the Old West:
The date Marty leaves the Old West:
The date Marty arrives back in 1985 and the DeLorean is destroyed:
So there we go. Now, STOP IT.
When we last left our run through Weezer’s song history, the 2002 album Maladroit – essentially a “best of” collection of the previous year’s worth of recording and releasing new songs online – had failed to set the world on fire, despite a Muppets-themed video for one of its singles. Now read on to find out what happened over the next three years…
It’s July 2006. And yes, those of you who are paying attention will notice this means that the first issue of Phonogram has yet to be published. But that’s the kind of story this is.
Well, that new Weezer album turned out to be rather good, didn’t it? So much so that I’m really looking forward to discussing it in detail, particularly in the context of everything that preceded it. So with that in mind, I’d really better get around to finishing off said context. Here, then, is the latest part of my era-by-era trek through the band’s songwriting history. If this is the first time you’ve landed on one of these posts, you might want to head back to the start and go from there. But if you’re up to date, if you’ll recall that last time around we left things at the end of The Green Album‘s release period – so let’s crack on with the hectic remainder of 2001…
“I believe that the best way to show how music affects the world is to take evidence directly from life to show how music has changed me and people around me. Not that it’s a particularly truthful form of biography. There’s a key line in the second issue: ‘Sometimes the truth just gets in the way of what really happens.’ That’s absolutely key. The phrase I’m using is Automythology.” – Kieron Gillen